Monday, November 23, 2015

Mama Interview :: JEANNA

Monday, November 23, 2015




Tell us about you:
I'm a 41 year old wife and mom of 5 who works from home and schools from home with my husband as my sidekick. I'm the coleader of Essential Families, a group of Young Living distributors and basically that just means, I am able to have lots of freedom in work and life bc of the amaze MLM I am a part of. (Yes, I used to hate MLMs too, but it's really a flipping dream, y'all.)

What does a regular day look like for you?
Busy, messy and literally different every day. Lots of pajamas, computers, yoga pants, diapers, chores, yelling, laughing, mine craft, prayers, coffee and wine. 

How do you manage to balance life and being a mom?
lol. Balance is elusive. Somehow we are all alive, well, semi clean and mostly happy. I am a free spirit and a messy who was raised to be a tidy. I know how to organize, schedule and plan, but it works against my nature, so as we have had more and more children and lifestyle changes, I am learning to go with the flow. It's so hard because I have old tapes playing in my head telling me I'm doing it wrong all of the time, but I'm learning to turn down the volume and turn up my self talk. 

When did you know you wanted to be a mom? Was it something you always knew or was there a certain moment?
I've always wanted to be a mom. A mom and a teacher and I'm both. 

How has motherhood changed you?
Huge daily servings of humble pie. My kiddos are mirrors who reflect all that God wants to work out in me. He has softened me round the edges literally and figuratively through my children. 

What's the hardest thing about being a mother? The most rewarding?
The hardest thing is knowing my own weaknesses and failures and grasping the magnitude of the task of raising them to be themselves...not little mes. The most rewarding is the love, the warmth, the richness of having a large family & watching how we all bring out the best and worst in each other while experiencing and extending daily grace. Grace in action is beautiful. 



What is your biggest fear as a mother?
That one of my children would get a terminal illness, honestly. I'm not as afraid of them dying, bc I know the outcome. I just cannot bear to watch them suffer.  Also, That I would say or do something to crush my kiddos' spirit. I have a sharp tongue that I am not proud of. 

Do you ever have "how the heck am I going to this!?" moments?
Yes. Many. Especially since working full time again and trying to navigate my biz and marriage and homeschooling w all 7 of us here all the time. Feeling everyone will be better off without me down my running shoes and take off. But, I'm not a quitter. Thank God.

What's the best piece of advice you have been given?
Admit when you are wrong and apologize to your kids... Be as honest as you can with them about your own shortcomings and failures and your own need for mercy. Show them how much you need Jesus daily so that they will never think you are perfect and have all the answers. When you don't know the answers, show them how you look to the Lord for answers or research or however you learn and grow! 

Biggest worry about your child's/children's future?
Hmmm. I don't really worry about their future. Maybe that they will never find what they truly love to do and end up settling for status quo. 

What would you say to a woman who is feeling down about herself as a mom?
God doesn't make mistakes. He knew that you were just the mother of your children needed he created you for this purpose. At your weakest point, he will give you strength to persevere. He cares even more about your kiddos than you.

 Do you feel like social media has a positive or negative (or both) influence on motherhood?
Don't get me started. More negative than positive, and that's probably all I should say, buuuut, I'll go on. I feel like social media for moms brings the pain of never measuring up to the appearance of fashion models in magazine into the home. Before social media, pretty much all we women spent our time bashing ourselves about was our appearances. Now that we can see into the daily lives of other moms who appear to have it all together, I see a whole generation of new moms who feel like they're never going to measure up... Here my heart on this, I am all over social media, but I recognize this problem. I'm almost 42 years old and I'm actually so glad that I made it through my 20s and most of my 30s before social media hit. I don't even know how I would feel about myself right now otherwise.

Have you ever been in a situation (or witnessed one) where someone made you feel ashamed for something you did as a mom? Were you able to overcome it? How? What are your thoughts on mom bashing and shaming and how would you like to see it change?
MOPS is the devil.  I mean, I'm joking of course, but I was involved in mops in my early parenting years and there was so much mom bashing that went on, it was ridiculous. Everyone was constantly comparing cloth diapers to disposable, breast-feeding to formula, homeschooling, working,vaccinations...everything that they still do. It's the worst feeling to watch a mom shrink back in embarrassment because she has been jumped on by a bunch of other moms for how she chooses to parent. I used to have strong opinions about a lot of things myself, but my mom always told me that we women should stick together and support one another in our choices. I'll never forget when she told me that every mom is just trying to do her best. There's no mom out there who thinks, "I'm just going to be a really sucky mom." Everyone does the best they can with the skills they have. We should have grace and learn from one another without judgement! 




What's one tip you would share with future moms?
Trust your instincts, you're the mama!

How or what do you want you kids to remember you by?
My love and grace for them and others.

What is something you miss about life before your kids?
The feeling of being bored.

What's something that people close to you might not know?
I'm such an open book, it's hard to even think of one thing. 

What inspires you most?
Listening to others share what they are passionate about...regardless of the topic and whether or not I agree. I'm super attracted to fiery passionate people! 


What is one question you would ask your mother (about anything)?
What's your biggest regret as a mom of adults? 


Are you proud of yourself and who you have become as a mom? Would you change anything?
I am. I mean, I still need some serious character development, but I'm working on myself. So that's what I would change, but that has to happen over time.


Who are some inspiring mamas you follow on Instagram?
@jaminato / @trishaiford / @chibbz 

Where can we follow you?
IG @lichtenhouse
Blog: fixing to be all changed, but now: www.lifewiththels.com  & www.mamasgottheoilyouneed.com 
FB: YL Essential Families and Jeanna Lichtenberger

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